The conversations I have nowadays are pretty interesting. Some people who have never have a reason to talk to me otherwise seem to enjoy long and involved versions of this repeated exchange: “You’re pregnant.” “Yup, sure am.”
Others go beyond the basic observation to add some fancy and customized judgment.
Week 15: A woman I know who has three kids says, “See, this week you hardly even look pregnant! A little bloated maybe, but that’s it.”
Week 28 (first day of my third trimester): A man making small talk while I wait for a food order spends five minutes telling me how big I am. “You must be due soon!” “Wow! You’re so big!” “Are you sure you’re not having twins?” (Twice.) “I have another customer who’s due next month and she’s MUCH smaller than you are!”
Week 28: A man I work with didn’t understand why I kept quiet about my pregnancy early on, and despite my attempted explanation of concerns about miscarriage and my professional life, continued to say, “But why wouldn’t you just tell people? That doesn’t make any sense. You should have just told everyone.” I excused myself from the conversation when he started making rude comments about another pregnant woman walking by us.
And those are just the ones that stand out.
Look, when you’re pregnant, you know it’s coming. Everyone tells you about the unsolicited advice, the rude comments, the weird obsession people have with your belly. Even so, it catches you off guard when it happens, and sometimes it takes a minute to sort out whether you’re sensitive or they’re rude. Frankly, it’s usually the latter. At 30 weeks, I’m starting to think the reason we don’t see a lot of late pregnancy ladies out in public is not only because it’s such a pain in the ass to move from home base, but also because they are so flipping sick of people talking to them for no other reason than to discuss the fact of their pregnancy with them.
Instead of reinventing the wheel with the do’s and don’ts of talking to pregnant women, I’ll share a short and sweet list of 15 Rules for Talking to Pregnant Women. (Pay close attention to the three things you can say at the end.)
Happy Renaissancing!
Renaissancing Me 